Afterwards
by Lachrymose Lindsey
Summary: The Captains point of view after he and Maria danced the Landler together, and after the children went to bed. He's waiting for Maria to come and join the party. I couldn't really think of a good title for this.


"How could this be happening? This couldn't, shouldn't be happening. I'm in love with Elsa. I am in love with Elsa. Am I in love with Elsa? It was those eyes of hers. I got lost in her amazing blue- listen to yourself Georg. Why should I give a damn what color her eyes are or how positively beautiful-."

Captain Von Trapp growled in frustration. He'd been arguing with himself ever since the dance. The dance that proved Maria had feelings for him, or so he thought.

He couldn't keep her out of his mind. As he mingled with party guests, mentally he was only half there. He was anticipating Maria's return.

"I'll just go and ask her. Maria do you?- do you what? I can't just say "oh yes frauline Maria a question! Do you love me? She'll think I'm insane. Hell I think I'm insane."

He kept playing the moment over and over again in his mind. The way she pulled away from him. Had he let too much feeling show through? He thought he had trained himself not to let emotions through. For the children's sake. When their mother died he vowed not to let them see him cry. If he had broken down how would they have ever learned to be strong? Even if they couldn't be strong they would have had no one to be strong for them. He now realized that he had gone a little too far with the no emotions goal. Maria had shown him that.

There were several questions buzzing around in his head. Mainly was he truly in love with her? Could it just be a crush? A silly childish crush? He had to know for a fact! No second guesses, once it was out, it was out. And less importantly Elsa. How would she react? He couldn't just tell her he wasn't interested anymore. What a scandal it would be. The Baron Von Trapp left a baroness for a little nun girl? People would gossip for weeks.

The Captain sighed. He was so confused. Ever since the night that lovely little governess had gotten here he was confused. There was something about her that first night. He knew she was different. No one had ever spoken to him that way. There was the usual "yes, sir" and "no, sir" but she had gotten sassy with him, the way a child would. It was slightly attractive. He chuckled. He was attracted to her. To her differences. To her honesty. To her great independence, but was that enough to make use of the "L" word?

She had brought his children back to him and he loved her for that. He loved her happy go lucky personality, how she sang to the children in that amazingly wonderful voice, she was full of love. Love he longed to have. He caught himself smiling without meaning to. He wished she'd come back down to the party. Maybe then he could figure out his feelings for her. He couldn't seem to make sense of anything this evening. Yes, maybe if he saw her again something would float into his mind. It had been fifteen minutes already. The Baroness had gone with her, how long did it take to get a woman dressed?

As he was thinking this he saw Elsa coming towards him. With no Maria in sight. The Captain was slightly disappointed. Baroness Schrader looked rather happy with herself. He wondered why.

They began to dance. The Captain wasn't in the mood for dancing. It just reminded him of what had happened only a quarter of an hour ago. Perhaps if he concentrated on the steps it would take his mind off of Maria. He was trying his best but she crept back into his mind. The dance between him and the Baroness became uncomfortable. He felt as if he had been unfaithful to her. She was looking into his eyes, or at least trying to. That didn't help matters, there was no spark as there had been with Maria. Georg felt as if he had to get away from this party. He didn't like parties. He'd rather be sitting in his study reading, or maybe just thinking. He needed to have time to collect his thoughts. Especially at this particular moment.

As they were dancing he glanced towards the door. Perhaps looking for an escape. In that exact moment he noticed the door shut. Who could have left? The name Maria popped into his mind, but that was absurd. Why would Maria leave? Yes, it was one of the guests he assured himself.

The song ended. The Baroness said something. The Captain wasn't listening.

"…Darling? Did you hear me? I said I was going to speak with Max." Elsa repeated.

"What? Oh. Yes. Yes. Of course." She walked away to find "Uncle Max".

The Captain felt the need to go outside. He needed some air. The music in here was getting to him. Thinking was impossible. That's all he wanted to do was think. The music reminded him too much of the dance. The one with Maria and the uncomfortable one with The Baroness.

He started for the hallway. Hoping to leave unnoticed. Passing the Austrian flag that he displayed so proudly, he noticed a little white slip of paper on one of the mirrored tables. As he approached it he realized it was an envelope that was addressed "The Captain and Children". He ripped it open impatiently. It was from Maria! She had left. He was dumbfounded. Why would she want to leave? Had he done something wrong? Had the children been too much? He doubted that. She loved the children.

She must had left only a few moments ago. In an attempt to stop her, The Captain rushed to the door, opened it harshly, and looked out into the darkness. But there was no one. He was too late. She was most likely half way back to the abbey by now. She was gone. Gone out of his life forever.

He was glad he was the only one out in the entranceway. He felt like a fool standing there at the open door. Why didn't he tell her earlier? He now realized that he would miss her. It was true. You don't know what you have, until it's gone. What a time to realize that he'd loved her since that first night! He felt defeated. There was nothing else he could do. His mind had been made up for him. The Captain was going to go back to his original plan.

The ring in his pocket felt as heavy as his heart, as he turned to go back to the ballroom. Before finding Elsa he took a deep breath and assured himself that this was the right thing to do. Maria was gone. There was nothing else to it. She hadn't loved him. If she cared enough she would have stayed.

He found The Baroness talking and laughing with some of his friends. He announced loud enough for everyone to hear: "Ladies and gentlemen can I have your attention please?" The Baroness turned to find him standing quite close to her. "I have a very important question I need to ask The Baroness." The crowd went into a silence. Elsa gasped as The Captain pulled the ring from his pocket. "Elsa?... will you marry me?"

"Yes! Yes! Of course Georg!" He slipped the ring on her finger and they embraced. He tried to push the image of the short haired beauty to the back of his mind.


End file.
